Risks: Life without them is like today at work-incredibly dull and totally pointless. (except that I still get paid for showing up-risks aren't THAT predictable.
Using logic in an effort to understand the risks I take and do not take isn't really very helpful either. For instance: I have driven over the speed limit on curving roads and ridden my bike down steep hills or even stairs without hesitation. I have even jumped off a cliff into water (not on a bike) that I could barely see since I wasnt' wearing my glasses. Granted the amount of thought given to each risk varied but all were taken-typically in the name of personal enjoyment.
So, apparently I am okay with some risks to life and limb. Throw women into the mix of things, however, and my approach to risk-taking loses most semblance of logical thought. The same me that likes to walk around outside in a Nor'easter is generally unwilling to take the minimal risk of asking a gal for her number or even to grab a cup of coffee. Unless I am talking to a particularly dangerous femme fatale, which is unlikely in my line of work, the chances of my receiving serious bodily injury is far less than in the aforementioned activities.
Where am I going with this? Well, the contradictions is incredibly frustrating when I try to make sense of it. While I am not usually naive enough to expect all of my emotions to be logical, there is a basic failure to correctly evaluate risk in my dealings with the opposite sex. Stereotypically, men are known for doing and not thinking. While I often fall under that stereotype, I find that more often I spend more time thinking than doing anything. It is amazing how many scenarios you can think of that lead to rejection when you never even test one. Even with past experiences where things did not go as planned, they were not nearly as painful as miscalculations made when trail running.
I would like to say that I am prepared to go out there and take all kinds of risks now but that isn't exactly the point I am trying to make here. (If this entry indeed has a point...) I want to take more risks while developing a more realistic view of the level of risk involved. I.E." Asking girl to get coffee is a minimal risk in most cases while asking for a woman's hand in marriage is indeed a big risk and should be more carefully considered. While the simplicity of that example is somewhat overstated, I think the point gets across.
So I suppose the "logical" question is What do I do now? Think less, act more, might be a good start but I guess I should stick to at least somewhat manageable ideas. The chance of me thinking less is pretty low...
So, short of asking out every girl I run across-which will eventually guarantee that I dont' meet any more gals-I need to work on being more honest in my actions. Showing a little extra attention to a gal I am interested in wouldn't hurt-though it could get me in trouble and I would actually risk rejection. Funny thing-a person can't really reject you if they don't know you like them. That makes it safer, but extremely boring. Thus I am back where this entry started and I think it is time for me to get to sleep.
